February 2, 2005
Entry #1 - The start of the end?
(This is just a portion of my first entry)
So here I am, a 42 year old, white male and tomorrow I am having a biopsy to determine if the problems I am experiencing are ultimately diagnosed as Prostate Cancer. Grim thought indeed.
…. I am fighting to remain positive. I pray a lot more than I ever have.
I worry most about my wife and young son and how they would go on?.... But I worry about them both emotionally and psychologically. I can't imagine going on without her or him, it saddens me deeply. I pray a lot more than I ever have......
February 2, 2011
Entry #589 – It’s Blog-aversary VI
Now I find myself here, an outlier, way down the right side of the bell curve. Wondering, worrying, still trying to find fresh perspectives to share with you.
I try to keep the focus on what I am feeling and thinking versus what I am doing. For example; when I share that I had/have treatment I think readers appreciate it more when I share that it worries me, that I am hurting and what I’m thinking about. Anyone can post the mechanics of living with this or any disease, but I have always tried to reach deeper, beyond the scans, tests and needles. I really try to provide something unique that other survivors can use. Maybe they learn something and gain just a little insight in order to deal with what may lie ahead for them.
As I mentioned to a fellow PCa survivor earlier today, “It’s a badge that most of us would relinquish if we had the option. We don’t have that choice so some of us share it hoping to provide just a little light in an otherwise dark cancerous world.”