August 26, 2005

Lurking right below the surface…

It's there, always. Not far away, waiting for the opportune moment to pounce right into my conscious thoughts. It's fear.

While I struggle daily, hourly, sometimes minute by excruciating minute to remain positive there are times (more lately) that I just plain get scared. I know it's normal and I should be, but I don't want to be - I want to always be strong, always be positive and in the end, always be here. I'm not giving up. I never, ever will! it's just every now and again BAM!

I started reading Lance Armstrong's second book. I'm only 40 pages in but it's good to know that he understands what his situation, and experiences and his stature mean to the rest of us. He hasn’t run from it, he's run to it, he embraces it and understands it and it appears he will spend a good portion of his energy from this point forward focused on this cause. He sounds like a pretty cool guy, I'd love to leap off the cliffs into his swimming hole. (you have to read the book to get it)

Now there's a conflict ~ I'm scared on one hand, but want to jump 45+ feet into a lake for the thrill of it!

1 comment:

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